Parenting Tips for Moms and Dads of School-aged Children & Teenagers: The Impactful Parenting Podcast

How My Child's Brain Works with special guest Brian Hemmer, gives tips for how to communicate with your child and how brain development makes a difference in your child's daily performance.  Great information and from this Colorado coach and mental health professional!

To make an authentic connection with your child, try one of my FREE 30 Day challenges.   Sign up today and you’ll receive a new question to ask your child every day- for 30 days.  These questions provoke a new conversation with your child and get away from the boring questions like, “How was your day, and do you have any homework?”  Start connecting with your child one question at a time!  Completely FREE, so NO excuses! Sign up NOW and watch your connection grow with your child in 30 days! https://theimpactfulparent.com/connection

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

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Help For Emotional Eating:  Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

Do you have a child that struggles with ANXIETY? I CAN HELP! The FREE webinar on my fully online course to help children with big emotions will give you the framework you need to see a change in your child's behaviors! Check it out at https://theimpactfulparent.com/anxiety-webinar

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Help For Emotional Eating Transcript:

Kristina: Welcome, parents. Today we're going to talk about emotional eating. I have a special guest today. Her name is Melissa Rohlfs, and she is a life coach that helps women break free of sugar and emotional stress, and stress eating. I'm really excited to have her on to give us some great tips today. But most importantly, Melissa is a mom of two kids herself. Thank you for being on today with me, Melissa.

Melissa: Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here, Kristina.

Kristina:  Melissa, my first question is, so much of our eating habits get formed when we are young in our childhood. So was there a lot of sugar in your house when you were growing up?

Melissa: There was! I have fond memories of going to my grandparents' house with my mom, and the first thing we would do when we would walk in that back door, Kristina, is would go right for the cookies. There was always a drawer of cookies. So, yeah, absolutely. This bad habit was modeled.

Kristina:  Yeah, It was the same with my family. At grandma's house, we always had candy there. My mom loved her desserts too. It is kind of funny but, I was told to just eat breakfast growing up. It didn't matter what I ate, so I would have pumpkin pie for breakfast.  Not the best role modeling, but it was tasty, and I turned out fine, I suppose.  Tell me more about how you changed your relationship with food and how sugar has impacted your other areas of life.

Melissa:  I think it's made me a more calm mom, to be honest with you. There is a really profound effect that sugar has on our body, mental health, physical health, and emotional health. It used to make me anxious and almost angry. So, for me, reducing it (I'm not entirely sugar-free) but reducing it has really made me calmer. It's made me more confident, and it's helped me be better in control of my emotions. I definitely don't feel like I need the sugar to get through the day to survive anymore. When my kids were little, I often felt that way. I was just exhausted and running on fumes and using the sugar to really get through the day. Thankfully I'm not there anymore, so it's really changed so many things in my life.

Kristina: That's good. So, making the shift for you really was super beneficial?

Melissa: Absolutely! For everybody around me. I think as moms, we have such a powerful impact on our families. For me, when I changed that for myself, my husband saw the benefit too. He changed, and we wanted that for our kids as well. I think this is really exciting because when I was their age, I had no concept.

Kristina: Tell me a little bit about your experience with emotional eating.

Melissa: I used foods, specifically sugar, to press down the feelings. I didn't know what to do with Kristina because I was overwhelmed. I was exhausted. I was anxious. I was angry. I think motherhood brought many emotions that I wasn't prepared for, so I didn't know what to do because I felt guilty that I felt this way. I think people turn to food, either to feel better or stuff the feelings. Some people look for happy memories in their food.  But for me, my goal was to push the feelings down, and that doesn't work.

Kristina: I tend to eat when I'm bored. Tell me I'm not an anomaly.

Melissa: No, you're not an anomaly at all. In fact, a lot of people eat when they're bored. Yeah, it's very, very common.

Kristina: It's more than just something to do. It makes me feel better because I'm bored, and I just don't like feeling bored. Are there certain times in people's lives you see more emotional eating?

Melissa: COVID when it first hit! Also, being a new mom and feeling really overwhelmed. Transition times too.  Times we don't know how to handle or how to navigate. People use food to self-medicate or soothe. It can really just be a lot of different things.

Kristina:  Do you do help women limit sugars that aren't common too?  For example- sugars in wines or sodas?

Melissa: It's all of it because sugars are in everything. Even some ketchup has sugar! It is very sneaky. There's a lot of places you wouldn't suspect sugar to be hiding, and it is.  I do a lot of education on names for sugar. Just because the label doesn't say, sugar doesn't mean that it's not sugar. It's really important to know the different sugar names.

Kristina:  So that brings me to this question, What tips do you have for someone who might be in this position and needs help?

Melissa:  I think the best thing to do is to get curious. We can be really hard on ourselves, especially as women. So maybe if you could just take away that judgment and get curious and ask yourself, why am I going towards the sugar? Why am I eating right now? Am I hungry- is a really powerful question. And if the answer's no, then you're probably emotional eating. Replacing judgment with curiosity is really powerful. Asking yourself, Am I hungry? Also, become a label reader. Learn how to read the ingredients on the food label, not just the numbers but the actual ingredients. Watch how foods affect you because we're all different. One size doesn't fit all. Be mindful of how certain ingredients and certain foods affect you because they could be different for everybody.

Kristina: What I'm hearing you say is that it might be helpful to keep a journal. I'm going to be really honest here and say I can't read labels. Those big words on the back of boxes drive me crazy. They're really confusing, and I just don't have a lot of interest in learning how to read labels.  I'm a single mom of four kids. Reading labels and learning how to do that is not on the top priority list. With that in mind, for somebody who's like me, What am I looking for in terms of red flags?

Melissa:  That's a really great question. I think the basic premise with label reading is to keep it shorter. Fewer ingredients are better, and you want the ingredients that look familiar. If it's a word you can't pronounce, or if it's got 29 syllables and you don't know where it came from, it is probably not the best thing for you.  I love the idea you said of journaling. Maybe if you don't want to read the labels,- journal!  Keep track of mood, energy, and get aware of how certain foods impact you.

Kristina:  Tell me about your personal journey with food. How did this come about?

Melissa: We had a newborn baby who wasn't sleeping. We had a two-year-old who had some undiagnosed food allergies and some sensory challenges. My husband was traveling for work, and I had just been newly diagnosed with PTSD from childhood trauma. So I went the holistic approach and really learned about supplementation and the impact of food on mood and health.  We overhauled our food, the way that we ate, and it was such a game-changer!  I knew I had to help other people too.  I didn't know how good I could feel!

Kristina: One last question. If somebody's listening to this right now and they think they might be an emotional eater but not quite sure- what are some signs they might look for?

Melissa: If they find themselves grazing, you might be looking for something. Ask yourself, what am I looking for? Am I eating for nourishment and fuel for my body? Or not?

Kristina:  If people want to get a hold of you to get Help For Emotional Eating, how would they do that?

Melissa:  You can find me at my website, which is www.free2bcoaching.com

Kristina: Thank you so much for being here today. I'm sure there are so many moms out there who gained weight during COVID and need to kick our COVID bad habits and start living more healthier lives so we could be better parents!

Angry Children is a podcast that gives you 3 tips for helping your child.  Let's dig deeper to find out where the anger is stemming from and how I can help! 

Behavior Management FREE Webinar:  https://theimpactfulparent.com/anger-webinar

Anger Management website: https://theimpactfulparent.com/anger

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Don’t forget to follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

 

Transcript: 

I am angry.  My kids are mad too.  Everyone is on each other's nerves.  I do not have enough time in my day to do everything I need to do.   The laundry is non-stop and never-ending.  My kids are tired of my food, and I am annoyed that I must cook.  I miss babysitters and grandparents coming over to give me a break.   I want to spend fun moments with my kids, but we have exhausted all our "at-home" activities.   My high school kids are mad that they were robbed of prom, graduation, and after-school sports.  All my kids are angry that they must wear masks all day long, and they do not get to socialize with their friends the way they want.  Anger has become a consistent presence in our home.

How do we deal with our children's ongoing and evolving anger?  Well, the biggest mistake that most parents make is thinking that ANGER is the problem.  They want to eliminate the anger from the house and believe that by doing that- the problem will be solved.  It is easy to fall for that wrong belief because anger is what we see on the surface.  We can watch our kids, stomp their feet, slam the door, yell, hit, or storm off.  It is no wonder that most parents think that anger is the problem and the reason for their child's unacceptable behaviors.   But anger is not the problem.  Anger is NOT even the primary emotion.  Anger is a reactive emotion.   Our children get angry BECAUSE they have more underlying feelings happening, and they do not know how to deal with them.  Anger can be how children react to being nervous, insecure, and a whole slew of other feelings, but most of the time, anger comes from being sacred or from feeling helpless.  Fear drives a fight or flight instinctual reaction in humans, and when we are scared, our reactive behavior can be anger or "fight." When you understand this, it is no wonder that everyone is feeling angry.  COVID-19 has made our whole society feel a plethora of emotions, which include frustration, scared, uncertainty, tiredness, worry, nervousness, helplessness… the list goes on.  The anger is the reactive feeling to the combination of all these emotions because, just like a volcano filling up with emotional lava- the anger explodes out of the volcano, and it is anger we see on the surface.    

So, the next time your child is screaming, slamming doors, or storming away from you- remember to empathize with their emotions.  We are frustrated right now with the world and our circumstances, but our children have even less control of their own lives than adults do.  Children have even more insecurities, more questions, fewer answers, more fears, and lots of feelings of helplessness.   So next time, pause for a moment and put yourself in their shoes.  Help them identify the things that they can control and set those apart from the things they cannot change.

Step 1- Help your child identify WHAT OR WHO is making them feel emotional.

Step 2- Help your child identify WHICH emotions they are feeling. (sad, frustrated, helpless)

Step 3- Help your child identify WHAT they do not have any control over and WHERE THEY CAN HAVE SOME CONTROL.  For example, children do not have any control over wearing face coverings if they go back to school.   But they can control what their mask looks like if they want to decorate it or leave it plain,  if they are going to wear a shield instead, or if they're going to wear a store-bought or homemade mask.  It is much like the saying, "You don't always have control of what happens to you, but you do have control of how you react to it." Teaching your child to find their controllable choice will give them some power back.   This small shift can be the start of a domino effect for implementing emotional change in your child and your home. 

If you have a child struggling with anger, please check out my Behavior Management Course: Helping Children with big emotions.   Changing behaviors can be stressful, confusing, and exhausting.  You do not need to parent alone.   This course will walk you through the step by step process you need to teach your child how to control their emotions.   Check out the FREE Webinar that will tell you more about the course, and you can decide if it will be the right fit for your family. 

 

How To Talk To Teachers is a podcast about asking the right questions so that you can make parent-teacher conferences successful.   Teachers and Parents should be on the same team and the goal is to HELP YOUR CHILD.  

Free PDF for asking the right questions: https://theimpactfulparent.com/conferencespdf

Make an authentic connection with your child. Try a FREE 30 Day Challenge. You’ll receive a new question to ask your child every day- for 30 days. Get away from the boring questions and start connecting with your child one question at a time! https://theimpactfulparent.com/connection

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Don’t forget to follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

Transcript:

It is the parent-teacher conference season, and along with that comes a lot of anxiety and questions for both parents and students!   Today I will address some common questions that I get from parents so you can stop wondering and start taking an active role in the parent-teacher conferences day!

Common Question: Do I still need to go to Parent-Conferences if I know my kid has good grades in all their classes? 
Answer:  No, you don't have to go to the conferences; however, I suggest that you send an email to all the teachers and verify that there aren't any other outstanding issues that should be discussed.  School is more than just grades.  Parent-Teacher conferences are an excellent time to talk about behavior problems, attendance issues, social concerns, and next grade level preparation.   Make sure that the teacher doesn't have anything that they want to discuss with you.
Common Question: I know my child has some low grades and/or some behavioral concerns.  Is there anything I should do before conferences to prepare for talking to the teacher(s)? 
Answer:  Contact the teacher via email and voice your concerns.  Ask the teacher(s) if they want to meet you during conferences or at a different time to discuss the issues.  The reason you want to do this is, conferences are very regimented.  Usually, each family is only allowed a specific amount of time with the teacher to keep the day moving along.  If the teacher thinks you will need extra time, then this must be prepared before the conference day.   Perhaps the teacher can give you two conference slots or other arrangements can be made to provide you with the time you need to talk about your concerns.
Also, you may want to request an administrator, counselor or another specific teacher to be in attendance at the conference.  This should be scheduled ahead of time.
Lastly, bring in all the documentation that the teacher may need.  IEP, doctor recommendations, a list of concerns you see at home, 504 plans, behavioral plans, etc
Common Question: What if I am at the conference, and I find out that my child has some academic and/or behavioral concerns I didn't know about?  What should I do?

Answer: 
Picture it…. A different day when I was a working full-time teacher….. I have a conference with a parent.  They storm in the room and sit with arms crossed and obviously agitated.   They begin to tell me how disappointed they are that their kid has a bad grade and how come they didn’t know about this sooner!

As a teacher, the parent scenario I mentioned above is very frustrating.  I didn’t even know the parent wasn’t getting your emails. I had no idea that they were mad AND from the beginning- they thought I was the bad guy.  It is possible that your child acts differently at school than at home, so keep an open mind when entering the classroom to talk to your teacher.  Could the teacher be in the wrong- sure it is possible, but don’t automatically assume because conferences are complicated.   There are 3 perspectives to consider:

1. Teacher
2. Parent
3. Student

So, how do you get an accurate story from both the child and the teacher?  You need to know how to ask the right questions!  Today, I will be giving you LOTS of questions that you should consider asking!  Please don’t worry about scrambling to write it all down.  All you have to do is go to theimpactfulparent.com/resources and download the FREE parent-teacher conferences worksheet.   You can even print the worksheet out and take it in with you when you go to talk to your teachers. 

So, Let’s get started with what to ask the Teacher!

1. Have they been trying to contacting you? If not, why?  It is ok to ask.  Maybe they have too many students.  Maybe they have emailed, called or sent home notes and you haven’t been getting them.  Maybe your child hasn’t been telling you.  Maybe the school makes YOU responsible for checking grades online?   Find out where the communication break-down began.
2. I have had parents ask me things like, “I have been looking at their assignments on-line, But it seems the teacher isn’t keeping up with inputting grades?” What should I do?  I say, email the teacher. Confirm this is true. Email bugging is ok.  Just be tactful.   They can have 30 students in a class and that is a lot to grade!  English teachers, in particular, have a lot of grading.  Find out why the assignments aren’t posted, there may be a good reason, there may not be-but you are making the teacher aware that you are being an active participant in your child’s education and this alone is good and may even get them to be more on-the-ball.

Now picture this story:  I walk into parent-teacher conferences to find out that my child hasn’t been doing their work.  What!  I saw them do it!  They were working on that project all week!  Those math problems were finished and they put them in their backpack!  How can the teacher tell me that my child hasn’t been turning in the work when I have seen for myself that it has been done!

Whether your child is doing their work or not, you need to find out WHAT IS HAPPENING?   What is the root of the problem?  Is someone lying here? Is the work getting eaten by the dog each night?  Is my kid just being lazy and not being responsible?  Again, you don’t until you ask the right questions!  Here are more questions to ask the teacher:

1. What caused this? What is the teacher’s opinion about why the grade is so low? Is this a lack of studying? Is it just difficult content? Is it a lack of attention in class? Are there missing assignments? Remember my story about the child who I SAW do the homework, but the teacher said that they weren’t doing their work?  Well, this story ends with the parent looking in the child’s backpack and locker.  Yep.  All the assignments were there and completed but never turned in.  Sometimes our kids lack executive functioning skills and it is difficult for them to get a piece of paper from HOME to Backpack to Locker to classroom to teacher’s hands. 
2. Next, ask what can the student do to erase the past? Is there anything? Can they make anything up? Can anything be turned in for partial credit? Can they re-do tests?  This is up to the teacher and the integrity of the class.   Remember that teachers are doing more than teaching CONTENT.  They are teaching responsibility.   You want your kid to be a successful adult.  They need to learn to get work done on-time, meet deadlines, not procrastinate….  For future job success.  If you give too much leniency, you are teaching them that the rules don’t apply to them.
3. Next, ask the teacher what can the student do moving forward? Can we create a plan for keeping the student accountable? Can the teacher sign off that homework is written in their planner? Can the teacher post when big assignments are due? Can the student come in for extra help?  Can the student get a tutor?
4. It is also important you understand the environment that you want your child to be successful in. What is the typical workload each night? …. Know the expectations of the class. If they are supposed to be studying 2 times a week and your child is only studying once- this could be the problem.

A lot of questions to ask the teacher but knowing expectations and being on the same page as the teacher is step 1 for your child’s success!

Now let’s move to the child. Let’s say you find out that your child has a less than desirable grade.  After getting the teacher’s point of view, start asking questions to the student.   They are apart of the problem so they should also be apart of the solution too!  Here are questions to ask your child.

• What is their point of view on their grade? Do they think it is good enough or bad?
• What part of this grade do they take responsibility for? Can they admit that they have not studied, not turned in work, or that the material is difficult?
• What do they think they can do moving forward to make improvements?
• When did the problem start? Or what TYPE of assignments does this happen most often? For example, maybe they do good on homework assignments but don’t do well with in-class work because they get distracted? Maybe they are good with smaller assignments but find bigger, more complex assignments more challenging?
• Do they feel they need extra support? From a parent or from the teacher? Do they feel that they can improve on their own?
• Where are the old assignments now? Did you review the content you missed and needed to improve, or did they just throw the old papers and grades into the trash after they got them back? A lot of subjects build on past knowledge like Math or languages.  If they aren’t taking the time to review what they missed and learn it- then they are digging a deeper hole for themselves for the next assessment.
• What does their locker/backpack/binders look like? Are they organized, messy, or even scattered? How can having a more organized locker/backpack/binder improve their work?  You may have to walk them through this reasoning.
• Have you asked for help throughout the semester? Who have you been talking to about your grades? Anyone?  Have you reached out for any additional help?  Have you advocated for yourself to re-do or submit assignments late? Some kids just let the whole semester slide by before taking action because they feel helpless and simply don’t know what to do.  You may have to walk your child through steps that need to take to advocate for themselves. 
• What do their study habits look like? Do they have a schedule for working on homework? Are they procrastinating or doing homework in front of the TV? Once grades drop, study habits and expectations should be redefined. 
• What are their goals for this class? For this school year? How does not reaching their goals affect their future?  Are their goals attainable and realistic?  Getting some kids to forward-think and see natural consequences for their actions, is difficult for some.  They literally don’t have the connections developed in their brain to make the links.  You may have to spell it out for them!
• Have you been attending class and paying attention? Are you distracted in class? IF so, what can you do to improve your attention?
• Have you missed class a lot? How do you make up work when class is missed? What steps do you take to make-up work?

Asking your child all these questions are getting down to the WHY the grades are low.  If you start creating punishments or consequences without knowing the Why, will likely be ineffective. 

Be ready to hear the teacher out. Try not to go on the defensive automatically. Teachers see "mama and daddy bear" stance a lot but remember your child may act differently at school than they do at home. Keep in mind that most teachers want your child to be happy and successful too! Your goals are the same!  Teachers and parents should have a partnership. 

1. Start by asking the teacher for their side of the story. 
2. Now give the child a chance to speak their side of the story and express their concerns.  
3. The goal now is to correct what can be repaired and move forward with a plan of action for improvement.  Discuss the plan together: teacher, parent, and student.  Make sure the plan is measurable,  attainable/doable, and there are concrete explanations.  For example, the student can not just say, “I will study more for tests.”  Instead, the goals should be specific; for example, I will study every Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday night for 30 minutes on this class.  You may even add WHEN they will study?  Designate a specific “homework hour” each evening.

Example of a goals sheet moving forward:

• Student will study every Monday-Thursday for 30 minutes.
• Student will keep locker clean and parents will check it every Friday at pick up
• Student will come in every Wednesday morning early to get questions answered.
• Student will study vocabulary words for the week Sunday night for 20 minutes.
• Student will not sit by friends in class.  The assigned seat will be front row.
• Student will not partner with friends for group projects. 
• Student will show their parent their planner each evening and tell them about homework.
• Student will check the school calendar for assignments and announcements every day at lunch.

1. Once the plan is made, you should write it down.  This is important.  Writing it down to reference it back later is extremely helpful later when the child may “forget” some of the plans, or you need to remind them of their commitment.

1. Lastly, make a reward and consequences system.  There should be 2 types of rewards, one is for small short-term gains that you can give for immediate feedback. Then there can be a bigger reward for maintaining the schedule the whole week or month.  Lastly, make a plan for consequences if they aren’t holding up their end of the deal. 

* This agreement INCLUDING THE REWARDS AND CONSEQUENCES, should be made WITH the student. They should agree to the contract and have input on the rewards and punishments. Buy-in from the student is essential and if they are not apart of creating the contract- they will never have buy-in.

Is your teen acting out?  Does your child seem anxious?  Maybe you feel that your child is starting to pull away from you emotionally?   Acting out, anxiety, and pulling away can signify that your child is not feeling secure in their primary needs.  What are their fundamental needs? Security, Acceptance, and Power.  So, before you yell at your child for the twentieth time for not listening, read this article and consider if their behavior is stemming from their primary needs not being met.

Fundamental Needs of Children #1: Security. If your child is not feeling secure, their instincts will pull them into a fight or flight mode.  This often comes out as either withdrawing from people and hiding in their rooms or becoming more aggressive and acting out.  However, as parents, we need to understand that children crave a sense of security beyond feeling physically safe.  Children are also looking for security in love.  Kids will start to test your love to see if they can genuinely be “secure” with you.   Will you love them through thick and thin? Will you love them if they disagree with your ways?  Will you love them if they are not the perfect straight-A student?  Children want to know that your love is secure and rooted in WHO they are and NOT what they do.   This brings us to #2….

Fundamental Needs of Children #2: Acceptance. Your child wants to be seen for their authentic self and accepted for that person.   This is especially important to teenagers discovering who they are and are trying on different “hats” to see what fits them best.  They want to know that you, as their parent, will accept them for whoever they choose to become.   They want their parents to look beyond their choices, grades, choice of friends, and music and truly accept them for who they are inside.

Fundamental Needs of Children #3: Power.  As your child gets older, they want to know that they matter. They want to feel they can have influence and that their existence has a place in the world.  People need to feel a sense of purpose.  Growing adults need to know that they impact others and that someone would miss them if they were gone.  This fundamental need is rooted in having a sense of power.  They matter in the world, and they are not powerless in their environment.  Teenagers will test their power and influence in the world.  Even the nicest kids will subconsciously push the boundaries of action and reaction or choice and consequence.  They want to know that what they do and say makes a difference in the world and if they find that they don’t make a difference- they often will get depressed or make “bigger” choices to test the consequences.

So, what can we do to help our children fill these three fundamental needs and improve their behaviors? Here is a list of suggestions.

• Provide Stability: a consistent schedule, predictable consequences, and known boundaries.
• Do not overreact. If your child knows you are going to freak out or get overly angry about their actions, you are sending them the message that you might not accept them. They need you to separate your feelings for their choices away from the person that they are.
• Words of Affirmation. Acknowledge their personality attributes.   Continue to tell them that you love them no matter what.  Let them express themselves, make their own choices, and affirm that their voice matters.  Let them contribute to family decisions.
• Start a conversation with your child or at least explore the questions on the FREE PDF link here, so you can begin figuring out WHERE the behavior is coming from and HOW your child is feeling. Go to: https://theimpactfulparent.com/whateverychildneeds

Meeting your child’s fundamental needs creates happier children and makes YOU a more impactful parent!

Don’t forget to follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

It is Question and Answer Thursday and today's question was: How Long Should  A Punishment Last?

Discipline Techniques that work Video:  https://theimpactfulparent.com/discipline

How To Get Your Child To Stop Lying Video:  https://theimpactfulparent.com/lying

**This episode was broadcasted live on YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Instagram.  Submissions for Q&A Thursday can be either emailed to The Impactful Parent directly or direct messaged through any of these social media platforms.  Submissions can be anonymous and are never mentioned in the Live Recording to respect the privacy of The Impactful Parent audience.  Email:  theimpactfulparent@gmail.com

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Make an authentic connection with your child. Try a FREE 30 Day Challenge. You’ll receive a new question to ask your child every day- for 30 days. Get away from the boring questions and start connecting with your child one question at a time! https://theimpactfulparent.com/connection

Follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

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Rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.” Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven’t done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you’re not subscribed, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out. Subscribe now!

It is Question and Answer Thursday and today's question was: Is my child gifted and talented?

FREE RESOURCE DOCUMENT YOU CAN DOWNLOAD:  A checklist for giftedness at https://theimpactfulparent.com/gifted

**This episode was broadcasted live on YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Instagram.  Submissions for Q&A Thursday can be either emailed to The Impactful Parent directly or direct messaged through any of these social media platforms.  Submissions can be anonymous and are never mentioned in the Live Recording to respect the privacy of The Impactful Parent audience.  Email:  theimpactfulparent@gmail.com

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Make an authentic connection with your child. Try a FREE 30 Day Challenge. You’ll receive a new question to ask your child every day- for 30 days. Get away from the boring questions and start connecting with your child one question at a time! https://theimpactfulparent.com/connection

Follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

“I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!”  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.” Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven’t done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you’re not subscribed, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out. Subscribe now!

4 Pillars To Self-Care YouTube video link:  https://youtu.be/mbVUpZakNqc

FREE PDF:  https://theimpactfulparent.com/lifebeyondchildren Gives you easy and manageable tips for making yourself a priority every single day!

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Don’t forget to follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

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I am screaming at my kids again.  I lost my patience, and I sulk in embarrassment as I apologize for my outburst.   Quarantine has got me losing my mind much more than usual.   It is NOW, more than ever, that we all need some TLC.   We all need self-care.  How can we give TO OUR CHILDREN if our tank is running on empty?   We cannot.  

Dr. Olena Kerek speaks with me this week about the 4 Pillars to Self-Care.   These 4 Pillars of Nutrition, Sleep, Exercise, and Mindfulness must all be met if we want to be our best selves and a good parent.  If we are eating well, exercising, feeling mentally sound, but do not sleep…. we can NOT perform our best.  This is also true if any of the other three pillars are falling short.  WE MUST strive to fulfill all four needs! 

Watch this week as Dr. Kerek gives The Impactful Parent community tips for being a better parent by meeting the four pillars to Self-Care! 

Postpartum Depression and Anxiety

NEW: The Inspire and Learn Series! 

I am very excited to announce The Impactful Parent's new series of videos called: the Inspire and Learn Series.  These interviews are REAL PARENTS with stories that will inspire you and have you learn from others' experiences.  

My first guest is Keisha Tower.  Keisha comes onto The Impactful Parent this week to discuss her personal struggles with anxiety and depression after having her 3 children.   Topics of discussion include:

• Did you have any anxiety or depression BEFORE you got pregnant?
• When did you get help? And what help?
• What was the low point?
• What were your symptoms and warning signs?
• Who supported you?
• Advice for a husband dealing with a postpartum wife
• What would you do differently?

Keisha Tower's journey is inspirational and relatable. 

Watch today and share this video with a friend that needs to hear her important message!

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Keisha can be found at The Kentucky Momma Podcast and at her website: thekentuckymomma.com

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Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

“I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!”  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.” Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven’t done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I’m adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you’re not subscribed, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out. Subscribe now!

This short video is the real truth behind the arguments in my household.  This funny, yet real, short story will have you laughing and relating. 

Make an authentic connection with your child. Try a FREE 30 Day Challenge. You’ll receive a new question to ask your child every day- for 30 days. Get away from the boring questions and start connecting with your child one question at a time! https://theimpactfulparent.com/connection

Don’t forget to check out all the FREE resources and tips that The Impactful Parent has to offer!  https://theimpactfulparent.com  Links to the YouTube channel and social media post are there too!  Join The impactful Parent community by signing up for the weekly newsletter. Don’t miss an impactful tip!

Don’t forget to follow The Impactful Parent on social Media! Facebook, Instagram, Linked In, Pinterest, and YouTube.

 

Transcription:

I have the ultimate family test of love, compassion, and sharing!  ……  “What is it, you ask?”    Share ONE iPhone charger for a week.  LOL  Yep, my family of 4 kids plays this game all-the-time!  They must love it because no matter how hard we try to keep the house stocked with chargers, it inevitably always comes down to ONE.  That one charger that has someone’s name written on it, but it has been smudged out so that no one can make out the writing.  That one charger that starts a war between siblings and turns the fight into a suburban version of The Hunger Games.  That one charger that barely works because it has been pulled out of the wall too many times and the wires are exposed.  This charger becomes a lifeline for my children and they fight over it like piranhas.  Sound familiar? 

Well, this week, I am turning the tables and need your advice and parenting tips!  What do you do?  I feel like there are a few options:

1. Take the charger away and let the electronics die a slow death. The consequence of this could be a lovely night that is screen-free, but I am more anticipating 4 kids crying in their bedrooms and weeping, moaning, and acting like, they too, are dying.
2. Pick one kid that has been especially awesome lately and let that child use the charger while the others cry in their room and yell at me for picking favorites.
3. Create a rotating schedule of charging everyone’s phone for 15 minutes. No one is happy, but their phone is given just enough life to keep the screen on.
4. I buy all 4 kids' new chargers, and I cry in my room, silently defeated by the parenting game because my kids just won.

What do you think?  Is there a better option?  What do you do?  Please leave your comments below so we all can benefit from your fantastic idea and experience.  That is what this community is all about; helping each other!  Let’s hear your advice!  In the meantime, I bought a Samsung.  Let the kids play this crazy game while my phone is still at 100%.  (wink, wink)

For more impactful parent tips, go to theimpactfulparent.com and to theimpactfulparent/youtube channel!

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