Parenting Stories, Struggles and Strategies for Moms and Dads of School-aged Children, Teenagers, and Impactful Parents

151: How To Have A Good Divorce (A Clubhouse Replay)

How To Have A Good Divorce

In this episode, 2 parenting coaching talk about the importance of having a "good divorce" so that transition become easier on the children and family unit.  Tips, advice, and personal experiences are talked about. 

This is a clubhouse episode rerun.  If you want to join the conversation LIVE, download the Clubhouse app and join us! Live recordings made Fridays, Noon EST on the App.  @impactfulparent to find Kristina and join her FREE Clubhouse rooms!  Email theimpactfulparent.com for questions.

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Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

152: Toughen Up Kid! How To Build Resiliency In Kids (A Clubhouse Replay)

Toughen Up Kid! How To Build Resiliency In Kids

This episode gives the 7 Steps for Building Resiliency In Kids. This episode breaks down the 7 steps and gives examples of personal experiences given by real parents on how they are building resiliency in their own homes. 

This episode is a Clubhouse Replay.  Come join the conversation LIVE! Download the Clubhouse app and find The Impactful Parent @impactfulparent inside the app.  Then join Kristina and other parenting coaching LIVE and in person every Friday at Noon EST.  

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Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

149: Get Kids Sleeping Better

Get Kids Sleeping Better with sleep consultant Missy Morrison Charko. Missy gives the audience tips for getting their children to sleep PLUS- Missy's interview comes with a FREE PDF and discounts for her services. Watch the video for more information and get your child sleeping soundly through the night!

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LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

https://theimpactfulparent.com/app Download the FREE Impactful Parent App! Available on Apple and Android App Stores. FREEBIES from episodes included!

Apple Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/ios

Android Play Store: https://theimpactfulparent.com/android

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

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Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

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Transcript for Get Kids Sleeping Better

Kristina: Welcome, Impactful Parent. Today, we're going to talk about seven actionable tips that will help your child start sleeping better, improve mood and behavior, and then pave the way for them to reach their full potential of the day.

Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I am the founder of The Impactful Parent. I help parents of school-aged children turn their chaos into connection with their adolescence. I offer free parent education videos every week, online courses, and coaching. If that wasn't enough, I bring experts in other fields onto The Impactful Parent stage to teach you even more. And today I have a special guest. Her name is Missy Morrison Charko. And Missy is a certified pediatric sleep consultant and founder of Say Yes To The Rest, pediatric sleep consulting. She helps exhausted parents with one-on-one support to get their children to sleep so that they can start to feel like themselves again. Thank you for being here, Missy.

Missy: Thank you so much for having me, Kristina. I'm super excited.

Kristina: So tell me, why is sleep so important for both kids and parents? Let's start there. The fundamentals. Why is this important for people?

Missy: Absolutely. Sleep is a necessity for everyone. When we wake up exhausted, our whole day is affected the next morning. It affects our workday. It affects our personal relationships. It affects everything we do for that next 24 hour period. For our teenage kids, it affects their day at school. Suppose they're not getting a good night's sleep; it affects their moods and behaviors. It affects their growth and development, too. So it's absolutely an important part of a healthy lifestyle and a necessity for all of us from babies up to our adult and older years.

Kristina: I know that it's just horrible if I don't get enough sleep. I also got teenagers who just refuse to accept that they need sleep.

What is the first tip that you believe parents need to use to help avoid bedtime battles with their kids, whether they're young or they're teenagers, so that we can get those kids in bed?

Missy: Boundaries and making sure that we're holding our ground is an important part of all of this. It's amazing how much you can do during the daytime that can come into the bedtime routine. Some kids want to push boundaries too. But parents need to stand their ground and be consistent.

Kristina: I love boundaries because boundaries create security for kids. They are more than rules. They create feelings of being secure with your caregiver. However, many people don't realize how important boundaries are. Do you have any tips for how to establish boundaries, especially for our older kids that are definitely going to be fighting back?

Missy: Absolutely. And I love what you just said about boundaries, Kristina. Children feel safer, and they feel secure when they have boundaries.

My first suggestion for you is to establish a bedtime routine. Bedtime routines are important for everyone, even teens and adults. Set a consistent bedtime routine every night, doing the same things every single night. Being consistent every night can help set those boundaries and create that consistent routine they need. Routine cues our body and our brain that it's time for sleep. Try dimming the lights when your child is getting ready for bed. Things like that can get that melatonin production going and help children fall asleep easier and quicker.

Kristina: One mistake that I see parents make is creating a bedtime routine that is too elaborate or long. As the child gets older, they're exhausted because it takes 30 minutes to an hour to put their older children to sleep. I want to clarify that a bedtime routine must be consistent but not elaborate.

Missy: Absolutely. We usually recommend a 15 to 30 minutes bedtime routine. If the routine is too long, the body and the mind forget that they need to sleep.

Kristina:  What's the biggest reason older children have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep?

Missy: Screen time. I also hear that kids pick up those screens in the middle of the night. Electronics are detrimental to sleep. Artificial light is the number one hindrance for adult and teen sleep disturbances. Blue light from screens decreases your melatonin production. It causes the cortisol hormone to jump instead. I recommend getting rid of screen time after dinner or at least a few hours before bedtime.

Kristina: How many hours should kids sleep, too?

Missy: We're looking for nine to 11 hours of sleep at night for our tweens and teens. We're looking for eight to 10 once we get to our adulthood.

Kristina:  What kind of advice do you have for parents that have children with bedtime fears?

Missy:  Try using soothing items to help your child calm their body. Sound machines are good. Special blankets and stuffed animals can also be helpful. If you've got a child who has a fear of the dark or is having nightmares, try a worry eater jar. Have your child write down their worries and put them into the jar. At night, their worries will disappear by the morning. It gives kids a little bit of peace of mind. That's just a fun little thing to do.

Also, do calming exercises or meditation. There are many apps that you can use to help bring anxiety down. If your child is afraid of the dark, you can try playing games in the dark with them during the awake hours. Dim the lights of a room and play shadow puppets or Hide and Seek.

Kristina: You are a great resource for our parents, but I know sleep problems tend to be more for our younger kids. So do you work with younger children as well?

Missy:  Absolutely. I love working with babies and toddlers. When we establish those healthy sleep habits early on, we're much less likely to see issues in these later school-age years.

Kristina: How does the audience contact you?

Missy: You can go to my website, www.sayyestotherest.com, where you can book a complimentary 15-minute child's sleep evaluation call with me. Those just allow me to get to know the family, see what sleep struggles they're going with, and see if we're the right fit to work together.

Kristina: That's not all! Missy has a freebie! Can you tell us a little bit more about that?

Missy: I have a PDF available for you that lists all of the topics I touched on today.

Kristina: Thank you, Missy.  

Audience, if you want to get that free PDF, you can find it Free inside the Impactful Parent app! It is available on the Apple App Store and Android Play Store or with this link: https://theimpactfulparent.com/app

And parents, if you want to become a more impactful parent, check out all them my website has to offer. I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free downloadable app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this. I'm just here to help.

148: Is This ADHD?

Is This ADHD? Understanding the signs of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

Kristina Campos, the founder of The Impactful Parent, talks to parents about Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, signs, and what parents can do to help their children.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

Is This ADHD?

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

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Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

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Transcripts for Is This ADHD?

Is this ADHD?

Understanding ADHD and its signs

Welcome Impactful Parents. Today we are going to talk about ADHD in your school-aged child.

Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I am the founder of the Impactful Parent. Every week I come on and answer one of your questions LIVE. If you have a question for next week, please submit it at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com or by messaging me on social media. All submissions are kept anonymous. 

Today, an audience member wrote in and said they think their child might have ADHD, but they don’t know for sure. This parent asked, what are the signs of ADHD, and how can I tell if I need to get my child diagnosed.

Thank you for submitting this question! Today I will tell you signs of ADHD and stick around to the end because I am giving you ---- tips for helping your child with ADHD so you can be a more impactful parent. Let’s get started!

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or ADHD looks like hyperactive and impulsive behaviors in children. There are many symptoms of ADHD, including high activity levels, difficulty remaining still, and a limited attention span.

There are 3 types of ADHD. Keep in mind it looks a little different in every person. Some children have inattentive and distractible behaviors without having hyperactivity. Some children have impulsive and hyperactive behaviors without inattention or trouble being distracted. And yet some other children have a combination of both. 

If you think your child might have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, consider that their ADHD has to be present in more than one area of life and in more than one setting to be diagnosed with ADHD. For example, their inattention and hyperactivity must be seen while doing homework and when trying to complete chores at home. The ADHD must also be noticeable at home and at school. Lastly, doctors will also be looking at whether these behaviors have lasted more than 6 months.

What does Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder look like?

Let’s start with signs of distract-abilities and inattention. 

Your child may exhibit:

• No attention to detail and make careless mistakes
• Trouble holding attention
• Doesn’t seem to listen
• Does not follow through with instructions or has trouble finishing schoolwork, chores, and duties
• Gets sidetracked
• Trouble with organization
• Avoids tasks that require mental effort for long periods
• Loses things they need
• Easily distracted
• Seems forgetful

Then there are also signs of hyperactivity that parents can look for. These signs might look like this:

• Your child fidgets, squirms, and can’t seem to keep still
• Leaves seat often and walks around when others can remain seated
• Climbs
• Restlessness
• Unable to take part in leisure activities
• Your child feels “On the go.”
• Talks excessively
• Blurts out their thoughts without thinking first and doesn’t seem to have a verbal filter
• Trouble waiting their turn
• Interrupts and intrudes

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder can cause many problems in children’s lives. This is why parents need to understand their child’s brains and help them control their behaviors if necessary. One of the most common problematic issues that arise with ADHD is impulsivity. Depending on your child, parents need to gauge if impulsive behaviors can lead to more trouble, like when a child can’t stop themselves from running into the street to get a ball or when they can’t control how they react when someone speaks harshly to them. Impulsive behaviors have the potential to lead to more problems. 

Other troubling side effects of ADHD in many children are anxiety, learning disabilities, trouble in school, trouble handling finances, and even trouble in the workplace depending on their job. Some people with mild systems may feel like none of these side effects are detrimental and opt to control their ADHD internally. Other families will seek a doctor’s assistance in managing the ADHD symptoms. Side effects aren’t harmful to the child’s goals and lifestyle.

Treatment for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder?

Treatment for Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder can come in the form of medication. This is a very popular way to handle the side effects of ADHD; however, it is not the only form of treatment. Behavior therapy, psychotherapy, and social skills training are other forms of treating ADHD and good options to look into with a mental health professional if you don’t want to use medication with your child.

What can parents do to help their child with ADHD?

Suppose you want to be a more impactful parent. In that case, there are also some things you can do at home to help your child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #1: Create a routine. Routine creates stability, predictability, and security for children. Children with ADHD accomplish more with routine. Whether you are making a morning or bedtime routine, a routine for homework completion, or a routine for household chores- your ADHD child will be more successful with a routine in place. Create consistency with what they need to do, when they need to work on their to-do list, and how tasks should be accomplished.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #2:  Use sticky notes. Anytime your child may need a little extra reminder that they have to complete a task, use a sticky note to help them. You can put sticky notes in their backpacks, lunch boxes, on the steering wheel of their car, on the bathroom mirror, anywhere! Be creative!

Parents can help their child with ADHD #3: Encourage your child to use a daily planner. From an early age, teach your child to write down their responsibilities and to-do lists. Younger children can draw a picture of their to-do item, and older children can use the calendar on their smartphones. Whatever type of planner or calendar you want to use, parents can help their ADHD child understand their responsibilities better if they teach their children how to make lists.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #4: Have a place for everything. This technique helps children not lose their things, misplace an item, or forget where they were. Purchase bins, tubs, shoe boxes, etc., and label those containers. This type of organization can be extremely helpful and save a lot of time looking for lost items.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #5: Help them get longer tasks done, like homework, by giving frequent movement breaks and breaking large tasks into smaller chunks. Your child will need the movement breaks to concentrate better. I suggest buying a visual timer and setting movement breaks every 20 minutes. Movement breaks should last about 5 minutes. Finally, help your child refocus and get back on task. This might look like helping them sit down and read the next homework question aloud to them or helping complete the next math problem. Either way, helping your child refocus is more effective than just telling your child they need to get back on track. You may also want to help your child break up their tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks so that their responsibilities don’t feel overwhelming. Kids often need help with this. Don’t assume that your child can automatically break down an activity into smaller pieces. They may need your assistance with this also until they master the skill.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #6: Make sure your child lives a healthy lifestyle. This means encouraging your child to eat well and sleep at least 8 hours at night. You also want to encourage plenty of exercises and physical activity.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #7: Limit distractions when you want your child to focus. This means turning off the background noise, the tv, the music and limiting the people in the room. The least amount of distractions possible will be beneficial.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #8: Praise your child often for their efforts. Kids with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder are often told “No” and “stop that” often. Instead, focus your attention on when your child is doing well so you can bring up their self-esteem. Give your child lots of affection and words of affirmation.

Parents can help their child with ADHD #9: Use a visual timer to help with transitions. Some kids with ADHD can’t identify time. 5 minutes and 15 minutes feel the same to them. To help kids transition from one activity to another, I suggest buying a visual timer and warning children about how long they have to complete a task. Let the visual timer show them how much time is left to start learning how to anticipate time management.

What can parents do to help their child with ADHD #10: Encourage out loud thinking. Anytime you can help your child think things through or problem solve, you will set them up for further success. Encourage your child to think aloud so you can hear their thought processes and help them navigate their thoughts and intentions.

 

And if you have a question you want to submit for me to answer live, please do! Submit your questions by DM or email at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com. Plus- if you want to become a more Impactful Parent, check out all that my website has to offer! I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free parenting app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this, parents. I am just here to help.

 

146: Best Options After High School To Continue Education

Best Options After High School with Emma Perez. Emma gives parents and students 7 options for continuing student education after high school. PLUS- this video comes with TWO FREEBIES to help your family make the perfect "After High School Choice!"

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

Best Options After High School

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

www.emmabperez.com for more from Emma Perez and access to her webinar freebie.

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Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

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Transcript for Best Options After High School

Kristina: Today, we're going to talk about seven ways for high schoolers to continue their education after high school, especially if you have a child that doesn't want to go to a traditional university.

Hello, my name is Kristina Campos, founder of The Impactful Parent. I help parents of school-aged children turn their chaos into connection with their adolescence. I offer free parent education videos every week, online courses, and coaching. And if that wasn't enough, I bring experts in other fields to The Impactful Parent stage to teach you even more. And today I have a special guest. Her name is Emma Perez. Emma is a college and career coach for teens and young adults. I'm really excited to have her here. We're gonna be talking about all the options that your child has after high school. Thank you for being here today. Emma.

Emma: Thank you so much for having me.

Kristina: I want to dive right in. What are the seven options after high school?

Emma: So a lot of times, there's a lot of relief to find out that there are other options. One of those options is university. Of all the seven options I'm going to discuss today, the university is the most costly option. I like to encourage families to really consider your return on investment for any educational pursuit that they take. Consider if the cost of a particular school, institution, or degree will out-weight the tuition costs.

Kristina:  I recently interviewed a financial advisor who was saying the same thing. College has become too expensive. Sometimes it may not be the right option for a child to go to university, depending on their career or degree. It just doesn't weigh anymore. Parents need to pause and consider that times have changed since their own upbringing. University may not be the best path for learning and choosing a career anymore.

Emma: We all know that the cost of college is increasing, especially compared to wages. In addition to that, colleges and universities started creating degree programs so that more kids would attend their universities. Many of these degree programs don't automatically lead to employment. There are still some occupations that the only choice is university. There are some occupations where you will have multiple choices, whether university or some other kind of schooling.

Kristina: I'm excited to hear the other options for students after high school. What is option #2?

Emma: A gap year. This doesn't mean that your child is just going to take a year off of schooling. Actually, most students will attend a gap year program. Most of these programs are community service-based. Some programs are far away in another country. Some programs may be expensive, but you could find scholarships. Other programs will offer a stipend and get scholarship money when they complete the program. Universities mostly really like gap years for kids because of the experiential learning that they're getting. Schools will allow you to defer your enrollment for a year to do a gap year program. The gap year can give your child the opportunity to mature, travel, experience new things and figure out their passion.

Kristina: How expensive is a gap?

Emma: Well, it really depends on the program. The price can be anywhere from free to as much as a university's tuition.

 

Kristina: Sounds like another great option with option. What is the next option for kids?

Emma:  Community College. Community college is the more affordable path to university because you can take your general education courses there at a much nicer price tag and potentially still live at home, so the child doesn't have living expenses.

However, community college also offers an alternative to university with professions that require an associate's degree, not a bachelor's degree. A great example is to be an American Sign Language interpreter. Community colleges offer this degree as a two-year program, and once you graduate, you're ready to work. Some community colleges even offer trades. Those degree programs can be nine months to two-year programs.

I think many parents see college as a good buffer between being a teenager and being an adult. But some kids actually need a buffer between high school and university.

Kristina: What about option number four?

Emma:  The military. The military offers degrees for jobs that you can have within the military or afterward in civilian life. After your military term, you also have VA benefits, and one of these benefits is money for college.

Kristina: Another great option that offers different paths for kids. And what about option number five?

Emma: Trade school. As I mentioned before that some community colleges offer trade programs. Other schools specialize in trade programs. These are nine to two-year programs where you earn a diploma or certification and train in a very specific trade.

Today, most tradesmen are baby boomers who will be retiring soon. Many jobs are going vacant. There's going to be a lot of job security here because there are so many vacant jobs, but these are also important jobs that we need. These are hands-on jobs. Some people don't want to sit behind a desk every day for the rest of their life. This could be a great option for many students!

There is an assumption that people don't make as much money with these trade professions. That is incorrect. Certain trades make plenty of money, especially if you decide to own your own business. Also, consider that the cost of education is far less and it's fewer years. You get to earning sooner!

Kristina: What is option number six?

Emma: Working with a business coach. Okay, so some young people are very entrepreneurial and might consider a business degree. But I want you to consider a business mentor and get involved in a Business Mastermind. With this option, the student would be coupled with a professional that could hold their hand while creating their own business, rather than going to a school. It will cost less money, so you'll have more money to invest in the business. This is not for every 17 or 18 year old out there, but there are some out there that it could be right for, so you just really want to calculate that return on investment.

Kristina: How do you find a business coach?

Emma: I know a few, and your audience can contact me for help. I can help them find a business coach that would be a good fit for the student.

Kristina: Great! Thank you. What is option number seven?

Emma: The last option will be the most cost-effective because it doesn't cost you any money at all. This option is an apprenticeship.

There are actually a lot of apprenticeships out there. You can go to apprenticeship.gov to find them. Instead of going to school and paying to learn, you actually get paid while you learn on the job. These programs can often be up to four years, like university. You'll start making a 50% salary, which will increase through your learning experience.

A great example here with the elevator repairman. This is a three or four-year apprenticeship. As soon as they're done, they start making about $79,000 a year with zero educational costs.

Kristina:  With seven options to choose from, how does a child know which path is right for them?

Emma: There are a few things that you want to consider. The first one is what do you want to do? Maybe the only option is a university, or a trade school is the only option. Or maybe you have multiple options. I also work with families to help students figure out their paths. I like to tell young people that you find your unique value in thinking about yourself as a person. What do you value? What do you care about? How do you want to spend your time, and how can you serve other people? When you think about things that you're uniquely good at and that you can bring to anything you do, you combine that with how you can serve other people. That's where you really find your unique values.

I also like to remind families that the path doesn't have to be set in stone. Most people will change careers as they grow. It is more important to focus on the student's skills and apply those skills to the real world.

Kristina: I am excited to tell that audience that you have a few freebies for them today.

Emma: Yes! Freebie #1 is a free seat in a webinar called How To Go Undecided to Excited. If you're a parent with a young person who may have an interest but don't know how to turn that into a job, or if they're not sure what their interests are, what they want to major, what they want to do- This is the webinar for you. We cover how to get your teen unstuck and ready to move forward.

Freebie number two is a worksheet for you to print out for each university that you visit and has lots of questions where you could put pros and cons. It is a worksheet to help you keep track of different university options and helps you ask the right questions at each college you look at.

Kristina: Thank you, Emma. I appreciate the help you are giving parents and students.

If you want to become a more impactful parent, check out all of my website has to offer. I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free downloadable app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this, parents. I'm just here to help.

 

147: Sex After Kids (A Clubhouse Replay)

Sex After Kids 

Today’s podcast is a clubhouse replay.  Clubhouse is a free app you can download on any apple or android device.  On the Clubhouse App, I host rooms where I talk about parenting topics. You can join me via your phone and become a part of the conversation anytime. My username on the app is Impactful Parent. For this Clubhouse episode, I was talking about SEX AFTER KIDS. I hope you enjoy this episode and next time, come join the conversation on Clubhouse.

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

145: Oppositional Defiant Disorder: Signs and Help

Oppositional Defiant Disorder: Signs and Help

Kristina Campos, the founder of The Impactful Parent, talks to parents about the signs of Oppositional Defiant Disorder In Children and how parents can help their children.

 

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

Oppositional Defiant Disorder In Children

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

-------

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

---------

Transcript for Oppositional Defiant Disorder In Children

Understanding Oppositional Defiant Disorder

Welcome Impactful Parents. Today we are going to talk about Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Signs of the disorder and what you can do as a parent.

Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I am the founder of the Impactful Parent. Every week I come on and answer one of your questions LIVE. If you have a question for next week, please submit it at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com or by messaging me on social media. All submissions are kept anonymous. 

Today's question from the audience is asking to understand Oppositional Defiant Disorder, so this parent (and you) can identify the symptoms and decide if their child needs to seek more help.

Thank you for submitting this question! Today I will tell you the signs of Oppositional Defiant Disorder and stick around to the end because I am giving you 10 tips for helping your child so you can be a more impactful parent. Let's get started!

Oppositional Defiant Disorder, or ODD, is when a child displays a continuing pattern of uncooperative, defiant, and hostile behavior towards people in authority. This could be anyone in authority and doesn't always have to be a battle against parents.

So what makes Oppositional Defiant Disorder different than a child that just seems to be argumentative or doesn't want to follow the rules? For children to be diagnosed with ODD, they need to have most of the following symptoms for more than 6 months. A lot of children will go through a phase of rebellion, but children with ODD will refuse authority figures way beyond the length of "just a phase."

• It will feel like the littlest thing might set off a child with ODD.
• The ODD child has to win arguments, and they won't give in to boundaries, rules, or someone trying to control them.
• Children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder have frequent temper tantrums.
• Children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder will argue with adults intentionally. It may feel like they are just picking a fight, and they will refuse to do what adults ask.
• Children with ODD can be very challenging because they will always question the rules and refuse to follow any rules they don't perceive will serve them.
• Kids with ODD typically won't hesitate to speak harshly to their parents, teachers, police officers, or anyone in authority. These kids are also annoyed with adults in authority often and will openly look angry and resentful.

Two of the most obvious qualities differentiating a typical rebellious child against a child with Oppositional Defiant Disorder is that children with ODD will be vindictive, be spiteful, do things to annoy or upset others on purpose, and blame others for their own misbehaviors or mistakes. Children with ODD don't typically take responsibility for their actions even when the blame is obvious.

Causes of Oppositional Defiant Disorder are unknown. Sometimes it can come from the onset of a head injury or developmental factors. Other times doctors say it could be genetic, developmental, or learned. ODD is associated with absent or neglectful parenting, but children with loving and present parents can also develop this condition. Either way, the exact reasons why anyone has ODD are unknown. To make things more difficult, Oppositional Defiant Disorder often is co-occurring with other disorders such as ADHD, depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, conduct disorder, and other learning disorders. It is also a misconception that Oppositional Defiant Disorder develops only in adolescents. This isn't true. ODD occurs at all ages of development and adulthood. 10.2% of all children develop ODD. Usually diagnosed at around age 8. 

Problems that come with ODD are usually:

• Poor school performance,
• Anti-social behavior,
• Substance abuse,
• Trouble building relationships,
• Poor impulse control,
• And suicide.

Parents need to educate themselves and get their children help with such detrimental repercussions. ODD is treatable. More than 65% of children with ODD see their symptoms go away in 3 years or less when kids get help.

So, what can parents do?

1. First of all, do not punish behaviors associated with ODD. It doesn't help. In fact, harsh discipline is a risk factor for developing the condition and can even make your child's condition worse. So obviously, this makes disciplining and parenting a challenge.
2. Instead, take the child to a mental health professional. Once your child is officially diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder, your doctor will encourage you to go to a therapist. The therapist will likely suggest various types of help. Some may suggest parent-child interaction therapy; others will recommend individual or family therapy. Some therapists may suggest parent training, social skills training for the child, or problem-solving training for the parent and the child.
3. Praise positive behaviors and give rewards for behaviors you want to see again. Focus on the good behaviors you see your child doing. Your child needs praise and recognition for things they do well (even if you're praising them for tasks that you feel any child should automatically do.) Children with ODD are used to adults being angry, frustrated, and annoyed with them. You want to give your child the opposite reaction and focus on giving your attention when things are going well, so they don't seek your attention negatively.
4. Model the behavior you want to see. Kids don't know what they don't know. So many times, parents just tell kids, "No, or "don't do that," but don't tell the child what they SHOULD be doing. It is not natural for kids to automatically understand better behavior. Parents need to SHOW children what they want from them. It is important to replace the bad behavior with what you need them to do, instead of leaving the child hanging with only what they can't do.
5. Avoid power struggles. Pick your battles and be selective with your boundaries.
6. Create a routine and provide consistency in the child's life. This means providing consistency with rules, expectations, and consequences for their actions. These things (rules, expectations, and consequences) should be discussed when the child is in a good mood and set as a standard when things are going well. Set limits and consequences for actions before they are trouble
7. Connection is important. These kids need more love and attention than you realize. They already have plenty of adults angry and frustrated with them.
8. Make sure every adult in the kid's life is on the same page. This goes back to creating consistency. Behaviors and expectations should be universal. Collaborate with teachers, coaches, counselors, and anyone else who might be in the child's life to create a consistent standard of expected behaviors.
9. Set your child up for success on purpose. This might be giving them a chore to do around the house that really doesn't matter if it gets done or not, but is still important to the household. Then, when the child completes their chore, you now have an opportunity to praise them and focus on the positive.
10. Take care of yourself. These are not easy children to parent, and your self-care should also be a priority. If you are tired, your patients will be shorter, and your mood will be more irritable. You need to take care of yourself to take care of your child. Make sure you are sleeping, socializing with friends, and eating well. I also suggest joining a parenting support group to help you vent in a safe place and get ideas from others about what works and what doesn't work in other households.

I hope that was helpful today. My last piece of advice for parents of children with ODD is to expect their child's behavior to worsen before it gets better. These children will likely reject any change they see in you, even if the change is positive for them. They will test your patients and push your buttons to see if the change you are creating is really intentional and if you really mean it. But now that you know that the behaviors will worsen before they get better, you can anticipate that rollercoaster and prepare yourself for the ride. 

And if you have a question you want to submit for me to answer live, please do! Submit your questions by DM or email at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com. Plus- if you want to become a more Impactful Parent, check out all that my website has to offer! I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free downloadable app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this, parents. I am just here to help.

 

144: 5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety

5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety

5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety with special guest Dr. Sandy Zanella. Dr. Zanella gives practical things that parents AND kids can do to help reduce their anxiety and calm themselves. Plus- with this episode, Dr. Zanella is giving the audience a FREE Mindful Scavenger Hunt for kids.

 

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

 

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

 

SUMMARY of 5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety:

Welcome impactful parents! Today, we will talk about 5 Ways To Reduce Anxiety.

[caption id="attachment_5807" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Ways To Reduce Anxiety[/caption]

Dr. Zanella gives practical things that parents AND kids can do to help reduce their anxiety and calm themselves.

Tips #1 Breathing. Dr. Zanella talks about why breathing works and HOW to breath so that it is effective. Dr. Zanella gives easy breathing techniques that anyone can do, even kids.

[caption id="attachment_5808" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Ways To Reduce Anxiety[/caption]

Tip #2- Affirmations. Dr. Zanella speaks about the importance of talking to yourself positively and how that changes the way we think over time.  Our thoughts affect our feelings and it is important to be aware of our thoughts to control feelings.

Tips #3 Yoga. Dr. Zanella gives the audience an easy pose to do in your office and sitting in your chair that will help you reduce anxiety.

[caption id="attachment_5809" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Ways To Reduce Anxiety[/caption]

Tips #4 Doodling.  Dr. Zanella talks about the science behind doodling to calm your emotions and even HOW to doodle to make the anxiety go away more effectively. 

Tip #5 Mindful Walks.  Dr. Zanella talks about the importance of connecting with nature to calm our nervous system.  She also gives the audience a FREE PDF Scavenger Hunt that kids can use to make mindful walks more fun and engaging.

 

142: How To Teach Kids Money Responsibility!

How To Teach Kids Money Responsibility!

Special guest Chris Larson gives the audience tips for teaching financial literacy to kids so that they can be money pros as adults!  This lesson is a must-see episode that parents need to watch, no matter what the age of their child!  It is never too late to start teaching money intelligence! Plus- this episode comes with 2 FREEBIES!  Let's get started!

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

How To Teach Kids Money Responsibility

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

http://nextlevelincom.com for more from Chris Larson

 

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

 

Transcript of Recording: How To Teach Kids Money Responsibility!

Kristina: Welcome, impactful parent. Today we're going to show you how to teach your children to be money pros. Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I'm the founder of The Impactful Parent, and welcome to my Inspire and Learn series where real parents come on and tell their story of inspiration and learning; because a wise man learns from his mistakes, but a wiser man learns from others people's mistakes. Today we're going to learn from Chris Larson. Chris is a self-made entrepreneur. He is passionate about helping families. He wants every family to get rid of the money burden and rest assured that they have prepared for the future. So he has developed a system for even teaching successful financial habits to his own children. And today, Chris is going to give us five ways to set up your kids for financial success and create lasting wealth for your family. Welcome to the stage, Chris.

[caption id="attachment_5761" align="aligncenter" width="300"] How To teach money responsibility[/caption]

Chris: Kristina, it's awesome to be here. Great to see you today.

Kristina: How will my audience relate to you, your family, and your financial success?

Chris: I wrote my book to help people take a shortcut and learn from all the mistakes I made. I love that intro because, you know, I don't consider myself a wise person. You know, I made a lot of mistakes, but I've had a lot of people help me out along the way. And unfortunately, I learned from real-life experiences. My father passed away when I was five years old. I grew up dealing with the stress of finances and cleaning up the mess after my father passed away. He died in a plane crash. He was a pilot. We went down in Lake Michigan. My mother couldn't get life insurance because they wouldn't issue a death certificate because they couldn't find his body for some time. I remember that we went on Social Security. My grandmother made my clothes for us. We ate vegetables out of cans. I got made fun of them for the clothes I wore and picked on for those things. Then my mother got remarried, and we were back on our feet for a while, but that didn’t last. I'll never forget both my parents losing their jobs when the real estate market crashed in the early 90s. I lost my internship coming out of college because of the tech crash of the late 90s early 2000s. And then, I watched my real estate portfolio drop in 2008 and 2009.

If you are going through these challenges, what I can tell you is there's a light at the end of the tunnel, and you can come out through the other side. But I think the most important thing to focus on when we're in stressful times is the fundamentals, especially when it comes to money. I realize many people struggle with how to convey good money sense and practices to their kids.  So, that's what I'd love to talk about today. You can do five easy things to set your kids up for a lifetime of financial success.

Kristina: What is your tip number one?

Chris: Start having conversations about money and get your kids a bank account. Show them what money is used for. Talk about how much groceries cost. You don't have to talk about how much you make. You don't have to talk about how much money you have in your retirement accounts or your house costs, but show them what money is used for. And again, start a bank account. If you haven't done this yet, go to your local bank and set up what's called a custodian account for your child.

[caption id="attachment_5760" align="aligncenter" width="300"] How To teach money responsibility[/caption]

Kristina: I love the suggestion of taking the kids to the bank with you. What's your second tip?

Chris: I actually pay my children a salary. I don’t call it an allowance. It is a salary, and my kids get $1 a day. Now here's the thing, they don't always get their dollar.  If my son leaves the lights on, he's wasting resources. Maybe he leaves the door open or doesn't pick up his clothes or do his laundry, then he may not get his dollar, or he may get money deducted from this account. Basically, if he does his chores and is respectful, he gets his money, but just like any other “job,” he doesn't get paid if he doesn’t show up.  If your child is disrespectful, they may get a deduction.

I also have my child keep track of their account balance with a ledger. He writes down what money comes in and what money goes out.  He also uses that money to buy things for himself.

Kristina: I love the idea of having kids earn money and keep track of it.  These are great skills. What else do you have for us? I love these suggestions.

Chris: Tip number three is to teach them about investment and the importance of saving. Teach them that they can be disciplined before spending. Require your children to save 10-50 % of their earnings. For the older child with a job, start a Roth IRA. A Roth IRA has a lot of flexibility and is very similar to a custodian account.

Kristina: Smart. Saving and investing are important! And what do you have for tip number four?

Chris: Now we are getting into a little bit more advanced strategies. My next tip is to start a business. Start a lemonade stand, shovel driveways, mow lawns, or whatever your child wants to do. Starting a simple business with them will teach them money control, managing expenses, talking to people, marketing, and so many other great skills. Nothing has to be complicated.

[caption id="attachment_5759" align="aligncenter" width="300"] How To teach money responsibility[/caption]

Kristina: That's my favorite suggestion yet. Entrenpeur skills are a great thing to teach your child. Plus, the quality time you'll get when you sit down with your kids and help is awesome.  Kids can do so much!  They can make bracelets for their friends. They can bake cookies. The possibilities for a business are endless.

Chris: And tip number five might be a little bit controversial. Teach children the true cost of college. There are a lot of studies out there that say you're better off if you go to college. You're going to make a million dollars more than if you didn't go to college. We have to remember that these studies are done on people going to college 40-50 years ago. College is a lot more expensive right now. I'm not saying to discourage your child from going to college. Children need to understand the return on investment from going to college. So this is what I mean.

Suppose I took $100,000 of college tuition and instead invested that money at 10%. Would it be worth more than a million dollars throughout their lifetime? College may or may not be the best choice for everybody, depending on their career path. Make sure you evaluate all these things, and there are many resources out there to help parents do this now.

Kristina: And your 5 tips are not all!  You have two freebies for my audience today.  The first is a cheat sheet PDF that summarizes the 5 steps.  The second freebie is your e-book! Thank you for these great resources.  Audience members can get those FREE by downloading The Impactful Parent App and finding those resources attached to this video. Go to theimpactfulparent.com and download the FREE APP today!

And if people want your assistance and want to reach out to you, how would they do that?

Chris: I am at www.nextlevelincome.com. Please reach out or email me!  I am here to help.

Kristina: Thank you so much, Chris. I really appreciate you being here. And if you have an inspiring story and want to share your story with the audience so that others can learn from you, go to https://theimpactfulparent.com/work-with-me  and sign up!

 And if you want to become a more impactful parent, check out all that my website has to offer. I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free downloadable app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this, parents. I'm just here to help.

 

143: Is My Child Hoarding?

Is my child Hoarding?  If you are concerned that your child's collections are getting out of hand, then this episode is for YOU! Kristina, the founder of The Impactful Parent, talks about the signs of hoarding, why your child might be hoarding, and 5 things parents can do today to help their child.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE RECORDING

Is my child Hoarding?

https://theimpactfulparent.com for more FREE Resources and paid programs.

https://theimpactfulparent.passion.io/

https://apps.apple.com/app/impactful-parent/id1601274505

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.prmto733iicm.ptt70cx5app

to download the FREE Impactful Parent App. Freebies included.

 

Rate, Review, & Subscribe!

"I love Kristina and all the FREE tips that she has to offer!  Thank you for making my parenting journey better!"  <– If that sounds like you, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps me support more people — just like you!!!

Rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let me know what you loved most about the episode!

Also, if you haven't done so already, subscribe to the podcast. I'm adding a bunch of bonus episodes to the feed and, if you're not subscribed, there's a good chance you'll miss out. Subscribe now!

 

What to do next:

1. Get The Impactful Parent App! Everything you need in your parenting journey in one spot! Available on the Android Play Store and the Apple Store. Search Impactful Parent (direct links listed above under Links in Episode).
2. Follow The Impactful Parenton social media if you don’t already! Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, & Pinterest
3. Subscribe to the PODCAST 
4. Check out the official website of The Impactful Parent for FREE RESOURCES, parenting classes, mom’s groups, and so much more! Click here to check it out!
5. Discover how you can work with Kristina!  Sign up for a FREE 30-minute discovery call! Click here to find a time that works best for you!

Bottom Line... I am here for YOU!  Contact me at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com 

 

Transcript for Is My Child Hoarding?

Welcome Impactful Parents. Today we are going to talk about hoarding in your school-aged child.

Hello, my name is Kristina Campos. I am the founder of the Impactful Parent. Every week I come on and answer one of your questions LIVE. If you have a question for next week, please submit it at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com or by messaging me on social media. All submissions are kept anonymous.

[caption id="attachment_5780" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Is My Child Hoarding?[/caption]

Today’s question reads: I have concerns that my child might be becoming a hoarder? He won’t let me throw anything away and seems to be collecting more junk every single day. Why is my child doing this?

Thank you for submitting this question! Today I will tell you the signs of hoarding, why your child might be hoarding, and stick around to the end because I am giving you 5 tips for WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING RIGHT NOW to be a more impactful parent. Let’s get started!

It is normal for children to have a messy room or collect things. But your child shouldn’t get hysterical if you throw away old pizza boxes or socks with holes. Is your child extremely attached to things that seem worthless? Are they collecting what seems like random objects, and it’s getting out of control? Or are they very upset by even the idea of getting rid of things they don’t use and don’t seem to have value to you- then your child might be developing a mental illness called hoarding.

Hoarding is sometimes seen in kids as young as 6 years old. Kids who hoard have persistent difficulties letting go of items. They will fill up their rooms with what seems like junk, even to the point where normal functioning in the room is difficult. Children who hoard will develop extreme anxiety about losing their possessions. If their parent tries to clean up or throw away their “trash,” these kids may throw a tantrum, cry uncontrollably, or even become violent.

Sometimes, children who hoard don’t understand why they are doing it. This is different from other children who will be proud to show off their collections. However, hoarders will acquire compulsively, save everything, may even be embarrassed to show people their collections, and their items may feel unorganized to an outsider looking at their stuff. The items your child is collecting might seem “useless” or even “trash.” They may not have space in their room for the items they are collecting, but it doesn’t matter to the child. And kids that hoard tend to pick up and pocket things they see on the street like coins, sticks, rocks, pinecones, etc.

[caption id="attachment_5781" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Is My Child Hoarding?[/caption]

Why would your child be doing this? Well, hoarders have a different pattern of thought. They could be hoarding because they fear something bad will happen if they throw their collectibles away. They may feel a sense of security and comfort by having their collection. Some kids feel a strong sense of “It is important not to waste,” so they keep their items. Other kids will associate their items with memory and feel that the memory will be gone if they throw the item away. They may say something like, “This rock reminds me of the time you took me to play basketball.” They feel like throwing the rock away will also throw away the memory. Some children who hoard believe that their items have feelings. They feel guilty if they discard the items away. For example, you may hear a child say, “I can’t put my rock in the closet. My rock might get scared of the dark or feel alone.”  To them, their possessions are like loved ones. They don’t see their stuff any different than a family pet or even a sibling.

Most children who develop hoarding at a young age (before adolescence) also have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Hoarding is related to OCD, but unlike OCD, kids are not hoarding to relieve anxiety. Hoarders collect because they think the item is cool, unique, they really want it, or they feel it could help them somehow. Anxiety only onsets when someone tries to get rid of their items or touches them without permission. For more information on OCD, you can watch my video on Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.

[caption id="attachment_5782" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Is My Child Hoarding?[/caption]

So what should you do if you have a child who is hoarding? Well, just as important as what you should do, let’s first talk about what you should NOT do.

1. Parents should NOT just clean up or throw away the child’s possessions. Why? The only thing this does is put a lot of stress on the child, making the problem worse. Your child will see you as a threat and not their ally. They will distrust you and become even more attached to their items. Even worse, children who don’t trust their parents will likely refuse their help in the future, and this means they won’t want to get professional help either. To get your child to stop hoarding, parents must treat the underlying issues and not just force change by taking matters into their own hands.
2. It is also important for parents not to cast judgment openly upon their children. You may think that their possession and obsessions are ridiculous, but you can’t show this to your child. Watch what kind of language you use to talk about their items. Don’t devalue their possessions, touch them without permission, or threaten to take away their stuff.

What can parents do?

1. Get your child officially diagnosed by a doctor and find a children’s therapist. Your therapist will likely work with your child through cognitive behavior therapy and exposure therapy. This entails working with how your child is thinking and, little by little, asking your child to practice letting go of their cherished items. Kids will also learn how to manage the anxiety during their “letting go” process.
2. Also, empathize with your child’s feelings. Encourage them to let go by rewarding behaviors you want to see and any child's efforts to let go of their items. Be your child’s biggest fan because you don’t want a ME versus YOU scenario in your home. Instead, you want to create a home culture of US against the PROBLEM.
3. And lastly, ask your child's permission before you throw out their possessions or move them around.

 

And if you have a question you want to submit for me to answer live, please do! Submit your questions by DM or email at theimpactfulparent@gmail.com. Plus- if you want to become a more Impactful Parent, check out all that my website has to offer! I have parenting courses, family coaching, a free downloadable app, and many free resources. But until next time, you got this, parents. I am just here to help.